In an effort to cheer up Hillary, someone should reminded her that Nelson Mandela wasn't elected president until after he had served 27 years in prison.
*.*
Seniors.
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes; come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller!
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop making me mad!
Old age is coming at a really bad time!
The biggest lie I tell myself is..."I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!
The kids’ text me "plz," which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes."
I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
*.*
World Begs U.S. To Use Military Force in Syria So They Can Bitch About It Later
NEW YORK — World leaders met at the United Nations today to beg the United States to use military force to stem the ever-growing humanitarian disaster in Syria, knowing full well they will then turn around and blame the US shortly thereafter.
UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon said, “We call upon the world’s greatest nation — the United States — to help bring peace to this terrible civil war, because, fuck it, none of us want to.”
“And the best part is, when this whole thing goes to hell in a handbasket — which, quite frankly, happens almost every time you intervene in a multi-sided civil war in a God-forsaken third-world country — none of us are responsible for it!” Ki-Moon added.
The “Blame America First” policy is a time-honored tradition in international relations, dating back to the outrage over the US Air Force’s targeted bombing campaign against the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia, followed by consternation over America’s idleness while the same Khmer Rouge murdered millions of their own countrymen.
“It’s pretty shameful, but hey, it got me a Pulitzer prize,” said Sydney Schanberg, whose two-faced coverage of the war in Cambodia in the New York Times inspired the Oscar-winning film, The Killing Fields.
“Amateurs tend to blame America first and then they’re done with it,” said anti-war MIT Professor Noam Chomsky. “Just this past week, Vox’s Amanda Taub blamed the U.S. for the entire Syrian Civil War instead of blaming, well, the Syrians themselves.”
“But that’s the type of ‘Blame America First’ coverage that gets you a few thousand clicks at best,” Chomsky continued. “If you really want Oscars, Pulitzers, and charity donations, you have to sucker the US into intervening, then blame America!”
“Just look at Somalia: Send the U.S. military to help deal with a famine, then, boom! A firefight, a downed Black Hawk helicopter, and before you know it, a blockbuster movie from Michael Bay!” he concluded.
Schanberg pointed to the fact the “Blame America First” strategy hasn’t always mired America in pointless tribal conflicts.
“We thought we had a real winner with the whole ‘Stop Kony’ campaign, and even the whole ‘Bring Back Our Girls’ thing. But the US just responded with a whole bunch of Twitter hashtags,” Schanberg said.
“Which just goes to show you, for Obama, black lives just don’t matter, I guess.”
British Labour Party candidate Jeremy Corbyn had already prepared a statement denouncing U.S. actions should it, indeed, be suckered into sending military forces to resolve the Syrian refugee crisis.
“The U.S. has flagrantly placed its flag all throughout the world: invading Iraq, Afghanistan,” Corbyn said. “Just who do they think they are? Britain?”
*.*
I'm Glad I'm A Man
I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe.
I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese
I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts
I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west
I don't get wasted after only 2 beers
and when I do drink I don't end up in tears.
I won't spend hours deciding what to wear,
I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair
and I don't go around checking my reflection
in everything shiny from every direction.
I don't whine in public and make us leave early
then when you ask "why", get all bitter and surly.
I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing
I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.
I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back
I don't carry our differences into the sack.
I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you
or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.
I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too
I know what the time is and I know what to do.
And I honestly think its a privilege for me
to have these two balls and stand when I pee
I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball
It's more fun than dealing with women after all
I won't cry if you figure out it's not going to work
I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk.
Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure
I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.
Yes, I'm glad I'm a man, a man you see
I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery
I don't get all bitchy every 28 days
I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise
I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true
I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!
*.*
I'm Glad I'm A Woman
I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am
I don't live off of Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam
I don't brag to my buddies about my erections
I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions
I don't get wasted at parties and act like a clown
and I know how to put the damned toilet seat down!
I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt
my belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut
and I don't go around "readjusting" my crotch
or yell like Tarzan when my head-board gets a notch
I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind
I'm a woman you see -- I'm just not that kind!
I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing
I don't have body hair like shag carpeting
It doesn't grow from my ears or cover my back
When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack
And what's on my head doesn't leave with my comb
I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome
Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side
I'm a woman, you know -- I've got far too much pride!
And I honestly think its a privilege for me
to have these two boobs and squat when I pee
I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal
I won't tell you my wife just does not understand
stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band
or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep
then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!
Yes, I'm glad I'm a woman, a woman you see
you can forget all about that old penis envy
I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks
join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick
I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful it's true
I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!
Issue of the Times;
In Iraq, I raided insurgents. In Virginia, the police raided Me By Alex Horton
Alex Horton is a member of the Defense Council at the Truman National Security Project. He served as an infantryman in Iraq with the Army’s 3rd Stryker Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division.
I got home from the bar and fell into bed soon after Saturday night bled into Sunday morning. I didn’t wake up until three police officers barged into my apartment, barking their presence at my door. They sped down the hallway to my bedroom, their service pistols drawn and leveled at me.
It was just past 9 a.m., and I was still under the covers. The only visible target was my head.
In the shouting and commotion, I felt an instant familiarity. I’d been here before. This was a raid.
I had done this a few dozen times myself, 6,000 miles away from my Alexandria, Va., apartment. As an Army infantryman in Iraq, I’d always been on the trigger side of the weapon. Now that I was on the barrel side, I recalled basic training’s most important firearm rule: Aim only at something you intend to kill.
I had conducted the same kind of raid on suspected bombmakers and high-value insurgents. But the Fairfax County officers in my apartment were aiming their weapons at a target whose rap sheet consisted only of parking tickets and an overdue library book.
My situation was terrifying. Lying facedown in bed, I knew that any move I made could be viewed as a threat. Instinct told me to get up and protect myself. Training told me that if I did, these officers would shoot me dead.
In a panic, I asked the officers what was going on but got no immediate answer. Their tactics were similar to the ones I used to clear rooms during the height of guerilla warfare in Iraq. I could almost admire it — their fluid sweep from the bedroom doorway to the distant corner. They stayed clear of one another’s lines of fire in case they needed to empty their Sig Sauer .40-caliber pistols into me.
They were well-trained, their supervisor later told me. But I knew that means little when adrenaline governs an imminent-danger scenario, real or imagined. Triggers are pulled. Mistakes are made.
I spread my arms out to either side. An officer jumped onto my bed and locked handcuffs onto my wrists. The officers rolled me from side to side, searching my boxers for weapons, then yanked me up to sit on the edge of the bed.
At first, I was stunned. I searched my memory for any incident that would justify a police raid. Then it clicked.
Earlier in the week, the managers of my apartment complex moved me to a model unit while a crew repaired a leak in my dishwasher. But they hadn’t informed my temporary neighbors. So when one resident noticed the door slightly cracked open to what he presumed was an unoccupied apartment, he looked in, saw me sleeping and called the police to report a squatter.
Sitting on the edge of the bed dressed only in underwear, I laughed. The situation was ludicrous and embarrassing. My only mistake had been failing to make sure the apartment door was completely closed before I threw myself into bed the night before.
I told the officers to check my driver’s license, nodding toward my khaki pants on the floor. It showed my address at a unit in the same complex. As the fog of their chaotic entry lifted, the officers realized it had been an unfortunate error. They walked me into the living room and removed the cuffs, though two continued to stand over me as the third contacted management to confirm my story. Once they were satisfied, they left.
When I later visited the Fairfax County police station to gather details about what went wrong, I met the shift commander, Lt. Erik Rhoads. I asked why his officers hadn’t contacted management before they raided the apartment. Why did they classify the incident as a forced entry, when the information they had suggested something innocuous? Why not evaluate the situation before escalating it?
Rhoads defended the procedure, calling the officers’ actions “on point.” It’s not standard to conduct investigations beforehand because that delays the apprehension of suspects, he told me.
I noted that the officers could have sought information from the apartment complex’s security guard that would have resolved the matter without violence. But he played down the importance of such information: “It doesn’t matter whatsoever what was said or not said at the security booth.”
This is where Rhoads is wrong. We’ve seen this troubling approach to law enforcement nationwide, in militarized police responses to nonviolent protesters and in fatal police shootings of unarmed citizens. The culture that encourages police officers to engage their weapons before gathering information promotes the mind-set that nothing, including citizen safety, is more important than officers’ personal security. That approach has caused public trust in law enforcement to deteriorate.
It’s the same culture that characterized the early phases of the Iraq war, in which I served a 15-month tour in 2006 and 2007. Soldiers left their sprawling bases in armored vehicles, leveling buildings with missile strikes and shooting up entire blocks during gun battles with insurgents, only to return to their protected bases and do it all again hours later.
The short-sighted notion that we should always protect ourselves endangered us more in the long term. It was a flawed strategy that could often create more insurgents than it stopped and inspired some Iraqis to hate us rather than help us.
In one instance in Baghdad, a stray round landed in a compound that our unit was building. An overzealous officer decided that we were under attack and ordered machine guns and grenade launchers to shoot at distant rooftops. A row of buildings caught fire, and we left our compound on foot, seeking to capture any injured fighters by entering structures choked with flames.
Instead, we found a man frantically pulling his furniture out of his house. “Thank you for your security!” he yelled in perfect English. He pointed to the billowing smoke. “This is what you call security?”
We didn’t find any insurgents. There weren’t any. But it was easy to imagine that we forged some in that fire. Similarly, when U.S. police officers use excessive force to control nonviolent citizens or respond to minor incidents, they lose supporters and public trust.
That’s a problem, because law enforcement officers need the cooperation of the communities they patrol in order to do their jobs effectively. In the early stages of the war, the U.S. military overlooked that reality as well. Leaders defined success as increasing military hold on geographic terrain, while the human terrain was the real battle. For example, when our platoon entered Iraq’s volatile Diyala province in early 2007, children at a school plugged their ears just before an IED exploded beneath one of our vehicles. The kids knew what was coming, but they saw no reason to warn us. Instead, they watched us drive right into the ambush. One of our men died, and in the subsequent crossfire, several insurgents and children were killed. We saw Iraqis cheering and dancing at the blast crater as we left the area hours later.
With the U.S. effort in Iraq faltering, Gen. David Petraeus unveiled a new counterinsurgency strategy that year. He believed that showing more restraint during gunfights would help foster Iraqis’ trust in U.S. forces and that forming better relationships with civilians would improve our intelligence-gathering. We refined our warrior mentality — the one that directed us to protect ourselves above all else — with a community-building component.
My unit began to patrol on foot almost exclusively, which was exceptionally more dangerous than staying inside our armored vehicles. We relinquished much of our personal security by entering dimly lit homes in insurgent strongholds. We didn’t know if the hand we would shake at each door held a detonator to a suicide vest or a small glass of hot, sugary tea.
But as a result, we better understood our environment and earned the allegiance of some people in it. The benefits quickly became clear. One day during that bloody summer, insurgents loaded a car with hundreds of pounds of explosives and parked it by a school. They knew we searched every building for hidden weapons caches, and they waited for us to gather near the car. But as we turned the corner to head toward the school, several Iraqis told us about the danger. We evacuated civilians from the area and called in a helicopter gunship to fire at the vehicle.
The resulting explosion pulverized half the building and blasted the car’s engine block through two cement walls. Shrapnel dropped like jagged hail as far as a quarter-mile away.
If we had not risked our safety by patrolling the neighborhood on foot, trusting our sources and gathering intelligence, it would have been a massacre. But no one was hurt in the blast.
Domestic police forces would benefit from a similar change in strategy. Instead of relying on aggression, they should rely more on relationships. Rather than responding to a squatter call with guns raised, they should knock on the door and extend a hand. But unfortunately, my encounter with officers is just one in a stream of recent examples of police placing their own safety ahead of those they’re sworn to serve and protect.
Rhoads, the Fairfax County police lieutenant, was upfront about this mind-set. He explained that it was standard procedure to point guns at suspects in many cases to protect the lives of police officers. Their firearm rules were different from mine; they aimed not to kill but to intimidate. According to reporting by The Washington Post, those rules are established in police training, which often emphasizes a violent response over deescalation. Recruits spend an average of eight hours learning how to neutralize tense situations; they spend more than seven times as many hours at the weapons range.
Of course, officers’ safety is vital, and they’re entitled to defend themselves and the communities they serve. But they’re failing to see the connection between their aggressive postures and the hostility they’ve encountered in Ferguson, Mo., Baltimore and other communities. When you level assault rifles at protesters, you create animosity. When you kill an unarmed man on his own property while his hands are raised — as Fairfax County police did in 2013 — you sow distrust. And when you threaten to Taser a woman during a routine traffic stop (as happened to 28-year-old Sandra Bland, who died in a Texas jail this month), you cultivate a fear of police. This makes policing more dangerous for everyone.
I understood the risks of war when I enlisted as an infantryman. Police officers should understand the risks in their jobs when they enroll in the academy, as well. That means knowing that personal safety can’t always come first. That is why it’s service. That’s why it’s sacrifice.
Quote of the Times;
Most things which are urgent are not important, and most things which are important are not urgent. - Eisenhower
Link of the Times;
http://madworldnews.com/blue-strip-curb-reason/
Iraq?
Entities?
I very quietly confided to my best friend that I was having an affair.
She turned to me and asked, 'Are you having it catered'?
And that, my friend…
Is the definition of 'OLD'!
*.*
Oneliners:
Someone coined the term, "coined the term".
If you think about it, Wolverine is a girls' name.
Compare a man to a horse and it's a compliment, compare a woman to a horse and it's an insult.
Blowjobs are oral contraceptives.
What if the human brain had its own black box which you could retrieve after death and playback that person's final thoughts.
If someone has a tattoo of a cross and is turned into a vampire what would happen?
What if dogs bring the ball back because they think you enjoy throwing it?
If a Satanist is angry at someone, do they tell them to go to heaven or hell?
Netflix should have a random button.
The new 'CD skip' is when the stream cuts out for a second.
Imagining what it must have been like to watch Alien (1979) for the first time and not knowing the chest bursting scene was coming up.
What do you get the man who has everything? Shelves.
Morning woods are just like bike stands so you don't roll off the bed.
They should have "EveningQuil" for when it’s too late for "DayQuil" but too early for "NyQuil".
They should have called DeflateGate the Patriot Act.
When ducks "put their money where their mouths are", they're paying their bills.
Everyone is immortal, until proven otherwise
Taking a hot bath is like making people tea.
Loot Crate should have a porn and sex toy subscription service called "Master-Crate".
Prostitutes and gigalos should collectively be referred to as "lay people.
*.*
Lockheed Upbeat Despite F-35 Losing Dogfight To Red Baron
BETHESDA, Md. — A spokesman for Lockheed Martin today denied that there is any reason to be alarmed about possible shortcomings of the military’s newest and most expensive fighter plane after reports surfaced this weekend that an F-35, piloted by a crack Air Force fighter pilot, lost a mock dogfight with a Fokker Dr.I Triplane similar to the aircraft once piloted by World War I German Ace Manfred von Richtofen, the “Red Baron,” piloted by a World War I reenactor.
“The F-35 isn’t really meant for that kind of fighting,” said Lance McCory, a Lockheed spokesman. “We intend it to be a first-rate mulitrole attack aircraft, and to excel at long-range fighting, what we call BVR, or ‘Beyond Visual Range’ air combat. Not to worry about some Hun who’s been dead a hundred years. Frankly, the two aircraft involved in this battle represent two different philosophies of air combat.”
The Fokker Dr.I Triplane, made of wood and doped linen, entered service with the German Army Air service in 1917. It was famous for its considerable maneuverability and its high rate of climb. The pilot sat in an open cockpit, exposed to the weather, and had primitive controls by today’s standards.
McCory went on to add, “The Dr.I triplane might out climb, out turn, and out dive the F-35, but where is its radar, huh? Where are its sensors? Where is the laser terrain guidance? Huh? Sure, up close, in a knife fight, the Dr.I has machine guns, and an F-35 pilot just has his sidearm. And [the Dr.I’s] cloth wings are nearly invisible to radar. But we have ‘the world’s most advanced fighter jet.'”
Capt. A.J. Schrag, an Air Combat Command spokesman, said “There’s no way to adapt the [Dr.I] airframe to carry the required missiles and radar. It might be good in a dogfight, but not standing off for close air support, and it’s completely hopeless when it comes to engaging targets in a BVR-type air battle.”
Meanwhile, according to a source close to the recent dogfight, the F-35 “turns like a garbage truck. It might be faster than the triplane, but that doesn’t matter in a stall fight.”
Lockheed officials have separately downplayed reports that the same F-35, flown by the same pilot, previously lost mock dogfights with the Goodyear Blimp and a beagle on a flying doghouse.
Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. Mark A. Welsh III declined comment through a spokesman, saying only, “Curse you, Red Baron!”
*.*
Amazon is going to open it's first-ever brick and mortar store in New York City. I suppose if it makes it there.
Disney says it will invest $1.3 billion into Disneyland Paris to deal with complaints of poor maintenance, lousy food and mediocre attractions. If it were me, the first thing I'd fix would be "It's a rude world after all."
A survey found that more than half of Americans see President Obama's time in office as a failure. And that's just among the fence-hoppers!
A new report claims gasoline prices in California could fall as much as thirty cents a gallon by Christmas. Yes, that's what you're getting this year.
Its fall in Seattle... or, as we call it, "the rinse cycle."
When I first heard Buffalo had fire their coach, I thought it was the Bills. It turns out it was the University of Buffalo. Then I heard they fired him after their loss last weekend to Eastern Michigan and then it made me think it was the Bills again.
The deer population on New York's Staten Island has gone from 24 to over 600 in just six years. Well, it's not like they have a TV to watch...
According to a new study, humans would only last 68 days if they tried to live on Mars. That is, until that new Starbucks goes in...
The stock market keeps falling. Then again, it is fall.
*.*
It's scary when you start making the same noises
As your coffee maker.
These days about half the stuff
In my shopping cart says,
'For fast relief.'
Grant me the senility to forget the people
I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and
The eyesight to tell the difference.
Issue of the Times;
Historical Truth by Walter E. Williams
We call the war of 1861 the Civil War. But is that right? A civil war is a struggle between two or more entities trying to take over the central government. Confederate President Jefferson Davis no more sought to take over Washington, D.C., than George Washington sought to take over London in 1776. Both wars, those of 1776 and 1861, were wars of independence. Such a recognition does not require one to sanction the horrors of slavery. We might ask, How much of the war was about slavery?
Was President Abraham Lincoln really for outlawing slavery? Let’s look at his words. In an 1858 letter, Lincoln said, “I have declared a thousand times, and now repeat that, in my opinion neither the General Government, nor any other power outside of the slave states, can constitutionally or rightfully interfere with slaves or slavery where it already exists.” In a Springfield, Illinois, speech, he explained: “My declarations upon this subject of Negroslavery may be misrepresented but cannot be misunderstood. I have said that I do not understand the Declaration (of Independence) to mean that all men were created equal in all respects.” Debating Sen. Stephen Douglas, Lincoln said, “I am not, nor ever have been, in favor of making voters or jurors of Negroes nor of qualifying them to hold office nor to intermarry with white people; and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the white and black races, which I believe will forever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality.”
What about Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation? Here are his words: “I view the matter (of slaves’ emancipation) as a practical war measure, to be decided upon according to the advantages or disadvantages it may offer to the suppression of the rebellion.” He also wrote: “I will also concede that emancipation would help us in Europe, and convince them that we are incited by something more than ambition.” When Lincoln first drafted the proclamation, war was going badly for the Union.
London and Paris were considering recognizing the Confederacy and assisting it in its war against the Union.
The Emancipation Proclamation was not a universal declaration. It specifically detailed where slaves were to be freed: only in those states “in rebellion against the United States.” Slaves remained slaves in states not in rebellion — such as Kentucky, Maryland, Delaware and Missouri. The hypocrisy of the Emancipation Proclamation came in for heavy criticism. Lincoln’s own secretary of state, William Seward, sarcastically said, “We show our sympathy with slavery by emancipating slaves where we cannot reach them and holding them in bondage where we can set them free.”
Lincoln did articulate a view of secession that would have been heartily endorsed by the Confederacy: “Any people anywhere, being inclined and having the power, have the right to rise up and shake off the existing government and form a new one that suits them better. … Nor is this right confined to cases in which the whole people of an existing government may choose to exercise it. Any portion of such people that can may revolutionize and make their own of so much of the territory as they inhabit.” Lincoln expressed that view in an 1848 speech in the U.S. House of Representatives, supporting the war with Mexico and the secession of Texas.
Why didn’t Lincoln share the same feelings about Southern secession? Following the money might help with an answer. Throughout most of our nation’s history, the only sources of federal revenue were excise taxes and tariffs. During the 1850s, tariffs amounted to 90 percent of federal revenue. Southern ports paid 75 percent of tariffs in 1859. What “responsible” politician would let that much revenue go?
Quote of the Times;
“Leftoids know, even if they won’t admit it now while the taboo is still powerful, that absent no-nonsense authority figures to stop them from indulging their worst instincts they will eventually find their way to pedophilia nonjudgmentalism.” - Chateau Heartiste
Link of the Times;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVioz6nQPRQ
She turned to me and asked, 'Are you having it catered'?
And that, my friend…
Is the definition of 'OLD'!
*.*
Oneliners:
Someone coined the term, "coined the term".
If you think about it, Wolverine is a girls' name.
Compare a man to a horse and it's a compliment, compare a woman to a horse and it's an insult.
Blowjobs are oral contraceptives.
What if the human brain had its own black box which you could retrieve after death and playback that person's final thoughts.
If someone has a tattoo of a cross and is turned into a vampire what would happen?
What if dogs bring the ball back because they think you enjoy throwing it?
If a Satanist is angry at someone, do they tell them to go to heaven or hell?
Netflix should have a random button.
The new 'CD skip' is when the stream cuts out for a second.
Imagining what it must have been like to watch Alien (1979) for the first time and not knowing the chest bursting scene was coming up.
What do you get the man who has everything? Shelves.
Morning woods are just like bike stands so you don't roll off the bed.
They should have "EveningQuil" for when it’s too late for "DayQuil" but too early for "NyQuil".
They should have called DeflateGate the Patriot Act.
When ducks "put their money where their mouths are", they're paying their bills.
Everyone is immortal, until proven otherwise
Taking a hot bath is like making people tea.
Loot Crate should have a porn and sex toy subscription service called "Master-Crate".
Prostitutes and gigalos should collectively be referred to as "lay people.
*.*
Lockheed Upbeat Despite F-35 Losing Dogfight To Red Baron
BETHESDA, Md. — A spokesman for Lockheed Martin today denied that there is any reason to be alarmed about possible shortcomings of the military’s newest and most expensive fighter plane after reports surfaced this weekend that an F-35, piloted by a crack Air Force fighter pilot, lost a mock dogfight with a Fokker Dr.I Triplane similar to the aircraft once piloted by World War I German Ace Manfred von Richtofen, the “Red Baron,” piloted by a World War I reenactor.
“The F-35 isn’t really meant for that kind of fighting,” said Lance McCory, a Lockheed spokesman. “We intend it to be a first-rate mulitrole attack aircraft, and to excel at long-range fighting, what we call BVR, or ‘Beyond Visual Range’ air combat. Not to worry about some Hun who’s been dead a hundred years. Frankly, the two aircraft involved in this battle represent two different philosophies of air combat.”
The Fokker Dr.I Triplane, made of wood and doped linen, entered service with the German Army Air service in 1917. It was famous for its considerable maneuverability and its high rate of climb. The pilot sat in an open cockpit, exposed to the weather, and had primitive controls by today’s standards.
McCory went on to add, “The Dr.I triplane might out climb, out turn, and out dive the F-35, but where is its radar, huh? Where are its sensors? Where is the laser terrain guidance? Huh? Sure, up close, in a knife fight, the Dr.I has machine guns, and an F-35 pilot just has his sidearm. And [the Dr.I’s] cloth wings are nearly invisible to radar. But we have ‘the world’s most advanced fighter jet.'”
Capt. A.J. Schrag, an Air Combat Command spokesman, said “There’s no way to adapt the [Dr.I] airframe to carry the required missiles and radar. It might be good in a dogfight, but not standing off for close air support, and it’s completely hopeless when it comes to engaging targets in a BVR-type air battle.”
Meanwhile, according to a source close to the recent dogfight, the F-35 “turns like a garbage truck. It might be faster than the triplane, but that doesn’t matter in a stall fight.”
Lockheed officials have separately downplayed reports that the same F-35, flown by the same pilot, previously lost mock dogfights with the Goodyear Blimp and a beagle on a flying doghouse.
Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. Mark A. Welsh III declined comment through a spokesman, saying only, “Curse you, Red Baron!”
*.*
Amazon is going to open it's first-ever brick and mortar store in New York City. I suppose if it makes it there.
Disney says it will invest $1.3 billion into Disneyland Paris to deal with complaints of poor maintenance, lousy food and mediocre attractions. If it were me, the first thing I'd fix would be "It's a rude world after all."
A survey found that more than half of Americans see President Obama's time in office as a failure. And that's just among the fence-hoppers!
A new report claims gasoline prices in California could fall as much as thirty cents a gallon by Christmas. Yes, that's what you're getting this year.
Its fall in Seattle... or, as we call it, "the rinse cycle."
When I first heard Buffalo had fire their coach, I thought it was the Bills. It turns out it was the University of Buffalo. Then I heard they fired him after their loss last weekend to Eastern Michigan and then it made me think it was the Bills again.
The deer population on New York's Staten Island has gone from 24 to over 600 in just six years. Well, it's not like they have a TV to watch...
According to a new study, humans would only last 68 days if they tried to live on Mars. That is, until that new Starbucks goes in...
The stock market keeps falling. Then again, it is fall.
*.*
It's scary when you start making the same noises
As your coffee maker.
These days about half the stuff
In my shopping cart says,
'For fast relief.'
Grant me the senility to forget the people
I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and
The eyesight to tell the difference.
Issue of the Times;
Historical Truth by Walter E. Williams
We call the war of 1861 the Civil War. But is that right? A civil war is a struggle between two or more entities trying to take over the central government. Confederate President Jefferson Davis no more sought to take over Washington, D.C., than George Washington sought to take over London in 1776. Both wars, those of 1776 and 1861, were wars of independence. Such a recognition does not require one to sanction the horrors of slavery. We might ask, How much of the war was about slavery?
Was President Abraham Lincoln really for outlawing slavery? Let’s look at his words. In an 1858 letter, Lincoln said, “I have declared a thousand times, and now repeat that, in my opinion neither the General Government, nor any other power outside of the slave states, can constitutionally or rightfully interfere with slaves or slavery where it already exists.” In a Springfield, Illinois, speech, he explained: “My declarations upon this subject of Negroslavery may be misrepresented but cannot be misunderstood. I have said that I do not understand the Declaration (of Independence) to mean that all men were created equal in all respects.” Debating Sen. Stephen Douglas, Lincoln said, “I am not, nor ever have been, in favor of making voters or jurors of Negroes nor of qualifying them to hold office nor to intermarry with white people; and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the white and black races, which I believe will forever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality.”
What about Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation? Here are his words: “I view the matter (of slaves’ emancipation) as a practical war measure, to be decided upon according to the advantages or disadvantages it may offer to the suppression of the rebellion.” He also wrote: “I will also concede that emancipation would help us in Europe, and convince them that we are incited by something more than ambition.” When Lincoln first drafted the proclamation, war was going badly for the Union.
London and Paris were considering recognizing the Confederacy and assisting it in its war against the Union.
The Emancipation Proclamation was not a universal declaration. It specifically detailed where slaves were to be freed: only in those states “in rebellion against the United States.” Slaves remained slaves in states not in rebellion — such as Kentucky, Maryland, Delaware and Missouri. The hypocrisy of the Emancipation Proclamation came in for heavy criticism. Lincoln’s own secretary of state, William Seward, sarcastically said, “We show our sympathy with slavery by emancipating slaves where we cannot reach them and holding them in bondage where we can set them free.”
Lincoln did articulate a view of secession that would have been heartily endorsed by the Confederacy: “Any people anywhere, being inclined and having the power, have the right to rise up and shake off the existing government and form a new one that suits them better. … Nor is this right confined to cases in which the whole people of an existing government may choose to exercise it. Any portion of such people that can may revolutionize and make their own of so much of the territory as they inhabit.” Lincoln expressed that view in an 1848 speech in the U.S. House of Representatives, supporting the war with Mexico and the secession of Texas.
Why didn’t Lincoln share the same feelings about Southern secession? Following the money might help with an answer. Throughout most of our nation’s history, the only sources of federal revenue were excise taxes and tariffs. During the 1850s, tariffs amounted to 90 percent of federal revenue. Southern ports paid 75 percent of tariffs in 1859. What “responsible” politician would let that much revenue go?
Quote of the Times;
“Leftoids know, even if they won’t admit it now while the taboo is still powerful, that absent no-nonsense authority figures to stop them from indulging their worst instincts they will eventually find their way to pedophilia nonjudgmentalism.” - Chateau Heartiste
Link of the Times;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVioz6nQPRQ
Smarmy?
If I could time travel I would go back in time so I could order something on Amazon and come back to the present so the thing I ordered would be waiting for me.
*.*
Special Forces To Change ‘Free The Oppressed’ Motto After Complaints From Afghans Holding Sex Slaves
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Top Army leaders have ordered its elite Special Forces unit to change its motto from the Latin “De Opresso Liber” (To liberate the oppressed) to something that would be more culturally sensitive, after a large number of Afghans holding child sex slaves have complained.
“We want to make sure we are not offending our coalition partners and not judging them based on our own biases,” said Col. Dwight S. Barry, a Pentagon spokesperson. “At the end of the day, we just have to respect that raping young boys and mutilating female genitals is just a part of their culture.”
Started in 1952, Army Special Forces chose its Latin motto of “De Opresso Liber” at a time when the U.S. was heavily focused on freeing people around the world from the chains of Soviet Communism. Now decades later, Army leaders want operators to be more aware of cultural differences they may not understand in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Berkeley, California.
The move comes in the wake of numerous complaints from Afghan men, who have chided U.S. military officials over previous run-ins with Special Forces soldiers unaware of the ancient Afghan custom of “bacha bazi.” The practice, which literally translates to “boy play,” consists of chaining children to beds, taking off their clothes, and then sexually assaulting them until they scream “bingo.”
Anger over U.S. military insensitivity toward “bacha bazi” is not the only issue in which Afghans have raised concern. The use of Special Forces “night raids” on high value targets has aroused suspicion among many locals in the past, and U.S. troops expressing discomfort around opium-addicted Afghan policemen as they throw acid in the faces of young girls has strained coalition partnerships.
In one high-profile incident, two Special Forces soldiers beat up an American-backed militia commander after they had learned he had raped a young boy and beat up his mother, a practice which goes back centuries and is perfectly normal in Afghan society. Fortunately, one of the American soldiers decided to leave the Army after the incident, while the other is being kicked out.
Officials are currently weighing a number of potential mottos as replacements, which include “Tolerate Iniustitia (Tolerate Injustice)” and “Ad Dissimulare (To Turn a Blind Eye).”
In addition to the change in motto, the Army band has also been directed to record a new version of the “Ballad of the Green Berets,” which was recorded during the Vietnam War. An initial draft of the lyrics include: “Silver wings upon their chest / These are men, America’s best / One hundred slaves get raped today / But all ignored by the Green Beret.”
*.*
A drunk is sitting on the street curb in front of a bar. A stranger comes buy and asks if he's O.K.
The drunk replies by asking, "Do you know who I am?"
The stranger says "No. Who are you?"
The drunk proudly says "I'm Jesus Christ... and I can prove it! Come with me!"
They enter the bar and the bartender looks up and yells "Jesus Christ! Are you here again?"
*.*
I Love Her, But...
... she makes lists; Things to buy, things to do, people to call. If it's not on the list, it doesn't get done. Once, to be funny, I put "sex" on the list. Mistake. Now it has to be on the list, or it doesn't get done.
--Nick, Wheeling, W.Va.
... you can hear her eat soup from the next room.
--Bruce, Bridgewater, N.J.
... when she gets an idea in her head, there's no stopping her. And no rest for anyone until it's done. It's not so bad when the idea is to bake cookies, or even to go on vacation. But when it's to build a new house, or to get pregnant, things get pretty intense.
--Jim, Minneapolis
... every so often boom! Shes a brunette. Or I come home to a redhead. Actually, I have no idea what her natural color is.
--Cary, Seattle
... she'll brush her teeth but she won't go to the dentist. She says she's not afraid of the pain; she just doesn't want to put herself in the hands of any fellow who'd choose to be a dentist.
--Terence, Gary, Ind.
... Shes stopped shaving her legs. She says that now people will know she's a natural blonde.
--Ned, Tucson, Ariz.
... it annoys her that our children look like me.
--James, New Orleans
... with five kids, I don't have time to complain about my wife. I don't have time to notice her.
--Bob, Charleston, W.Va.
*.*
Three men are sitting in the maternity ward of a hospital waiting for the imminent birth of their respective children. One is an Englishman, one a black South African and the other a West Indian.
They are all very nervous and pacing the floor, as you do in these situations. All of a sudden the doctor bursts through the double doors saying "Gentlemen you won't believe this but your wives have all had their babies within 5 minutes of each other." The men are beside themselves with happiness and joy. "And", said the doctor...
"They have all had little boys." The fathers are ecstatic and congratulate each other over and over.
"However we do have one slight problem," the doctor said. "In all the confusion we may have mixed the babies up getting them to the nursery and would be grateful if you could join us there to try and help identify them."
With that the West Indian raced passed the doctor and bolted to the nursery. Once inside he picked up the white skinned infant saying, there's no doubt about it, this boy is mine!" The doctor looked bewildered and said, "Well sir of all the babies I would have thought that maybe this child could be of English descent."
"That's a maybe", said the West Indian, "but one of the other two is a fucking South African and I'm not taking the risk."
Issue of the Times;
Leftist Legal Fictions and the Atheists Who Love Them by David Cole
I’ve never had much use for smug, arrogant leftist atheists like Bill Maher, Ricky Gervais, or Seth MacFarlane, whose smarmy “aren’t we ever-so-clever” attitude I find as irritating as a bur sweater. But this week, it occurred to me that in their own way, these self-satisfied annoyances have done the world a service. In the days before “atheist chic,” your typical left-wing follow-the-leader type could usually be counted on to respond to serious and sober questions with disjointed New Age bullshit. “Why are the school district’s math scores plummeting?” “Well, maybe it’s because we’re, like, confining the children’s cosmic minds by forcing them to adhere to the fascist concept of right and wrong answers, man. Maybe seven plus nine actually does equal 84, and these rainbow starchildren are trying to teach us a new way of thinking, man.”
Don’t get me wrong; 1970s-style Shirley MacLaine hooey still exists and still gets spouted. But thanks to atheist chic, there’s a new crop of leftists who braid “What Would Dawkins Do?” into their hipster beards (or their armpits, in the case of the women). These young leftists shun chakras and past lives in favor of almighty science. It’s a step up from the days of “There are no objective standards.” The smug atheist leftists will at least admit that there are standards, and that there are mathematical and scientific facts (all hail Dawkins, PBUH).
The overwhelming majority of these smug atheists are pro-choice, which is why last week was such a bad week for the “science is my God” leftists. They found out, much to their chagrin, that tumors have internal organs. Don’t you just love science?
“Science fact is now hate speech, thanks to an irrational leftist legal fiction that denies biological reality.”
The typical atheist leftist doesn’t have the guts to admit that abortion involves extinguishing a living being. Rather than displaying the boldness that atheists love to think they possess by just flat-out admitting, “Yes, it involves ending a life, but I prefer it to the alternative of women being forced by the government to carry to full term”—which would be an intellectually honest position—they prefer instead to speak of fetuses as “tumors,” the removal of which should spark no more concern, and just as much joy, as the removal of a cancerous cyst. So the stark, unpleasant image of a Planned Parenthood official discussing the removal of fetal organs over a standard-issue hipster luncheon of salad and wine was not good news for the “IFLScience” set. Because the notion that fetuses are tumors is one of the great pseudoscientific myths of the “we’re superior because we reject myths” crowd.
But it’s not the only myth. If you know one of these smug atheist leftists, it’s almost inevitable that you’ve heard them self-righteously grouse about the Citizens United decision and “corporate personhood.” “Corporations are not people. Does a corporation have, like, lungs and a liver and a heart? No, man. Corporate personhood is not scientific.” Hey, leftists, please allow me to introduce you to the concept of “legal fiction,” defined as “an assertion accepted as true, though probably fictitious, to achieve a particular goal in a legal matter.” I’d tried my best after Citizens United to explain the purpose and value of legal fictions to my leftist friends. But since leftists are typically only capable of grasping a concept once it becomes clear how it benefits them (“States’ rights means racism! Wait, it also means legalized pot? States’ rights rocks!”), I think the aftermath of the Planned Parenthood video is as good a moment as any to explain to leftists how they benefit from legal fictions.
One of the most blatant legal fictions in the U.S. today is that life begins when a woman says it does. In most states, a woman can be on her way to an abortion clinic to get her “tumor” legally sucked out, but if she stops at a mini-mart to buy some smokes and rethinks her decision, and if she gets caught in the middle of a robbery and takes a bullet to the gut and loses the baby, the robber can be charged with murder for doing exactly what the abortionist was about to do legally. If a woman wants to get an abortion, the baby is a tumor and the act is legal. If a woman wants to keep the baby, it’s a baby and anyone else can be prosecuted for harming it. To deal with the obvious contradiction between prosecuting people who destroy fetuses in some situations and protecting those who do it in others, a legal fiction was created, namely that life begins when it’s wanted. A wanted fetus is a life. An unwanted fetus is a tumor.
Well, guess what? That ain’t science. That’s as phony a concept as a corporation being a person. But a leftist will undeniably argue that this legal fiction is necessary in a society in which the destruction of a fetus is legal if the mother desires it, but illegal if the mother doesn’t. And maybe it is necessary. I’m not weighing in at all with my own opinion on the abortion minefield. All I’m saying is that smug atheist leftists should confront the existence of this legal fiction, and they should probably ask themselves why they’re okay with a medical health policy that has absolutely no basis in science. I mean, if everything is supposed to be all rational and scientific and Neil deGrasse Tyson-approved and all, “Life begins when it’s wanted” is as far from scientifically sound as possible. Does human life begin at conception? At viability outside the womb? At birth? Wherever you stand, human life does not begin when it’s desired. That’s pure hoodoo-voodoo superstition.
Few leftists are willing to confront this big steaming bowl of irrationality, and when they do, it’s usually with no sense of irony or self-awareness. Mary Elizabeth Williams, writing in Salon, argues that the difference between a stranger destroying a fetus and a woman and doctor doing the same is that the humanity of the fetus is based on the “dreams” of the mother. If the woman “dreams of becoming a mom,” and those dreams are dashed by anyone other than her, destroying a fetus is murder. The “science” of whether a fetus is a person or not comes down to the mother’s dreams. Science and medical policy based on dreams. Wow. And you’re okay with that, oh, ye spawns of Sagan? Should we hand over all medical science questions to a Yaqui shaman dream interpreter?
I could devote another entire piece to the new big leftist legal fiction—that gender is nothing more than how one chooses to “identify.” No biology involved at all, just desire, just pure old-fashioned wishing-well magic. This is, of course, another 100 percent antiscience construct. And it’s another way in which smug atheist leftists are proving that they can take to faith-based antiscience twaddle as easily as any “young Earth” creationist.
Last week, on what might as well have been called “Caitlyn Jenner Day” (also known as “the day hipster millennials learned there’s a channel called ESPN”), I posted this sentence in threads on a couple of trans-positive Facebook pages:
The fact is that women are different from men. The science backs this up. It’s taboo in some circles to suggest that we’re genetically different from each other, and yet we are. Sex is a biological construct. There are sex differences between men and women, and how those differences manifest and what happens, from a genetic level to how the body operates, is different.
In each case, I was attacked for being an ignorant, trans-hating bully, and my comments were removed. But that quote I posted…where’s it from? The first two sentences are from Phyllis Greenberger, president and CEO of the Society for Women’s Health Research (science!), writing in the Huffington Post. The rest is from Tamarra James-Todd, an epidemiologist at Harvard Medical School (science!), from an interview in The Guardian. Both women were writing about the dangers to women’s health posed by not including female test subjects in medical research.
Science fact is now hate speech, thanks to an irrational leftist legal fiction that denies biological reality. Most smug atheist leftists will undoubtedly deal with the cognitive dissonance by ignoring it. It’s amazing the extent to which the human mind can compartmentalize. “We’re better than those ignorant right-wingers because we believe in science, man! Oh, and fetuses are either living beings or nonliving tumors based entirely on the dreams of the mother, gender has no basis in biology, and wishing real hard can turn a dude into a woman.”
Best of luck in dealing with those contradictions, my little Bill Mahers. Vaya con ciencia.
Quote of the Times;
If you are going through hell, keep going. – Chruchill
Link of the Times;
http://akinokure.blogspot.com/2015/09/will-desecration-by-syrian-immigrants.html
*.*
Special Forces To Change ‘Free The Oppressed’ Motto After Complaints From Afghans Holding Sex Slaves
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Top Army leaders have ordered its elite Special Forces unit to change its motto from the Latin “De Opresso Liber” (To liberate the oppressed) to something that would be more culturally sensitive, after a large number of Afghans holding child sex slaves have complained.
“We want to make sure we are not offending our coalition partners and not judging them based on our own biases,” said Col. Dwight S. Barry, a Pentagon spokesperson. “At the end of the day, we just have to respect that raping young boys and mutilating female genitals is just a part of their culture.”
Started in 1952, Army Special Forces chose its Latin motto of “De Opresso Liber” at a time when the U.S. was heavily focused on freeing people around the world from the chains of Soviet Communism. Now decades later, Army leaders want operators to be more aware of cultural differences they may not understand in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Berkeley, California.
The move comes in the wake of numerous complaints from Afghan men, who have chided U.S. military officials over previous run-ins with Special Forces soldiers unaware of the ancient Afghan custom of “bacha bazi.” The practice, which literally translates to “boy play,” consists of chaining children to beds, taking off their clothes, and then sexually assaulting them until they scream “bingo.”
Anger over U.S. military insensitivity toward “bacha bazi” is not the only issue in which Afghans have raised concern. The use of Special Forces “night raids” on high value targets has aroused suspicion among many locals in the past, and U.S. troops expressing discomfort around opium-addicted Afghan policemen as they throw acid in the faces of young girls has strained coalition partnerships.
In one high-profile incident, two Special Forces soldiers beat up an American-backed militia commander after they had learned he had raped a young boy and beat up his mother, a practice which goes back centuries and is perfectly normal in Afghan society. Fortunately, one of the American soldiers decided to leave the Army after the incident, while the other is being kicked out.
Officials are currently weighing a number of potential mottos as replacements, which include “Tolerate Iniustitia (Tolerate Injustice)” and “Ad Dissimulare (To Turn a Blind Eye).”
In addition to the change in motto, the Army band has also been directed to record a new version of the “Ballad of the Green Berets,” which was recorded during the Vietnam War. An initial draft of the lyrics include: “Silver wings upon their chest / These are men, America’s best / One hundred slaves get raped today / But all ignored by the Green Beret.”
*.*
A drunk is sitting on the street curb in front of a bar. A stranger comes buy and asks if he's O.K.
The drunk replies by asking, "Do you know who I am?"
The stranger says "No. Who are you?"
The drunk proudly says "I'm Jesus Christ... and I can prove it! Come with me!"
They enter the bar and the bartender looks up and yells "Jesus Christ! Are you here again?"
*.*
I Love Her, But...
... she makes lists; Things to buy, things to do, people to call. If it's not on the list, it doesn't get done. Once, to be funny, I put "sex" on the list. Mistake. Now it has to be on the list, or it doesn't get done.
--Nick, Wheeling, W.Va.
... you can hear her eat soup from the next room.
--Bruce, Bridgewater, N.J.
... when she gets an idea in her head, there's no stopping her. And no rest for anyone until it's done. It's not so bad when the idea is to bake cookies, or even to go on vacation. But when it's to build a new house, or to get pregnant, things get pretty intense.
--Jim, Minneapolis
... every so often boom! Shes a brunette. Or I come home to a redhead. Actually, I have no idea what her natural color is.
--Cary, Seattle
... she'll brush her teeth but she won't go to the dentist. She says she's not afraid of the pain; she just doesn't want to put herself in the hands of any fellow who'd choose to be a dentist.
--Terence, Gary, Ind.
... Shes stopped shaving her legs. She says that now people will know she's a natural blonde.
--Ned, Tucson, Ariz.
... it annoys her that our children look like me.
--James, New Orleans
... with five kids, I don't have time to complain about my wife. I don't have time to notice her.
--Bob, Charleston, W.Va.
*.*
Three men are sitting in the maternity ward of a hospital waiting for the imminent birth of their respective children. One is an Englishman, one a black South African and the other a West Indian.
They are all very nervous and pacing the floor, as you do in these situations. All of a sudden the doctor bursts through the double doors saying "Gentlemen you won't believe this but your wives have all had their babies within 5 minutes of each other." The men are beside themselves with happiness and joy. "And", said the doctor...
"They have all had little boys." The fathers are ecstatic and congratulate each other over and over.
"However we do have one slight problem," the doctor said. "In all the confusion we may have mixed the babies up getting them to the nursery and would be grateful if you could join us there to try and help identify them."
With that the West Indian raced passed the doctor and bolted to the nursery. Once inside he picked up the white skinned infant saying, there's no doubt about it, this boy is mine!" The doctor looked bewildered and said, "Well sir of all the babies I would have thought that maybe this child could be of English descent."
"That's a maybe", said the West Indian, "but one of the other two is a fucking South African and I'm not taking the risk."
Issue of the Times;
Leftist Legal Fictions and the Atheists Who Love Them by David Cole
I’ve never had much use for smug, arrogant leftist atheists like Bill Maher, Ricky Gervais, or Seth MacFarlane, whose smarmy “aren’t we ever-so-clever” attitude I find as irritating as a bur sweater. But this week, it occurred to me that in their own way, these self-satisfied annoyances have done the world a service. In the days before “atheist chic,” your typical left-wing follow-the-leader type could usually be counted on to respond to serious and sober questions with disjointed New Age bullshit. “Why are the school district’s math scores plummeting?” “Well, maybe it’s because we’re, like, confining the children’s cosmic minds by forcing them to adhere to the fascist concept of right and wrong answers, man. Maybe seven plus nine actually does equal 84, and these rainbow starchildren are trying to teach us a new way of thinking, man.”
Don’t get me wrong; 1970s-style Shirley MacLaine hooey still exists and still gets spouted. But thanks to atheist chic, there’s a new crop of leftists who braid “What Would Dawkins Do?” into their hipster beards (or their armpits, in the case of the women). These young leftists shun chakras and past lives in favor of almighty science. It’s a step up from the days of “There are no objective standards.” The smug atheist leftists will at least admit that there are standards, and that there are mathematical and scientific facts (all hail Dawkins, PBUH).
The overwhelming majority of these smug atheists are pro-choice, which is why last week was such a bad week for the “science is my God” leftists. They found out, much to their chagrin, that tumors have internal organs. Don’t you just love science?
“Science fact is now hate speech, thanks to an irrational leftist legal fiction that denies biological reality.”
The typical atheist leftist doesn’t have the guts to admit that abortion involves extinguishing a living being. Rather than displaying the boldness that atheists love to think they possess by just flat-out admitting, “Yes, it involves ending a life, but I prefer it to the alternative of women being forced by the government to carry to full term”—which would be an intellectually honest position—they prefer instead to speak of fetuses as “tumors,” the removal of which should spark no more concern, and just as much joy, as the removal of a cancerous cyst. So the stark, unpleasant image of a Planned Parenthood official discussing the removal of fetal organs over a standard-issue hipster luncheon of salad and wine was not good news for the “IFLScience” set. Because the notion that fetuses are tumors is one of the great pseudoscientific myths of the “we’re superior because we reject myths” crowd.
But it’s not the only myth. If you know one of these smug atheist leftists, it’s almost inevitable that you’ve heard them self-righteously grouse about the Citizens United decision and “corporate personhood.” “Corporations are not people. Does a corporation have, like, lungs and a liver and a heart? No, man. Corporate personhood is not scientific.” Hey, leftists, please allow me to introduce you to the concept of “legal fiction,” defined as “an assertion accepted as true, though probably fictitious, to achieve a particular goal in a legal matter.” I’d tried my best after Citizens United to explain the purpose and value of legal fictions to my leftist friends. But since leftists are typically only capable of grasping a concept once it becomes clear how it benefits them (“States’ rights means racism! Wait, it also means legalized pot? States’ rights rocks!”), I think the aftermath of the Planned Parenthood video is as good a moment as any to explain to leftists how they benefit from legal fictions.
One of the most blatant legal fictions in the U.S. today is that life begins when a woman says it does. In most states, a woman can be on her way to an abortion clinic to get her “tumor” legally sucked out, but if she stops at a mini-mart to buy some smokes and rethinks her decision, and if she gets caught in the middle of a robbery and takes a bullet to the gut and loses the baby, the robber can be charged with murder for doing exactly what the abortionist was about to do legally. If a woman wants to get an abortion, the baby is a tumor and the act is legal. If a woman wants to keep the baby, it’s a baby and anyone else can be prosecuted for harming it. To deal with the obvious contradiction between prosecuting people who destroy fetuses in some situations and protecting those who do it in others, a legal fiction was created, namely that life begins when it’s wanted. A wanted fetus is a life. An unwanted fetus is a tumor.
Well, guess what? That ain’t science. That’s as phony a concept as a corporation being a person. But a leftist will undeniably argue that this legal fiction is necessary in a society in which the destruction of a fetus is legal if the mother desires it, but illegal if the mother doesn’t. And maybe it is necessary. I’m not weighing in at all with my own opinion on the abortion minefield. All I’m saying is that smug atheist leftists should confront the existence of this legal fiction, and they should probably ask themselves why they’re okay with a medical health policy that has absolutely no basis in science. I mean, if everything is supposed to be all rational and scientific and Neil deGrasse Tyson-approved and all, “Life begins when it’s wanted” is as far from scientifically sound as possible. Does human life begin at conception? At viability outside the womb? At birth? Wherever you stand, human life does not begin when it’s desired. That’s pure hoodoo-voodoo superstition.
Few leftists are willing to confront this big steaming bowl of irrationality, and when they do, it’s usually with no sense of irony or self-awareness. Mary Elizabeth Williams, writing in Salon, argues that the difference between a stranger destroying a fetus and a woman and doctor doing the same is that the humanity of the fetus is based on the “dreams” of the mother. If the woman “dreams of becoming a mom,” and those dreams are dashed by anyone other than her, destroying a fetus is murder. The “science” of whether a fetus is a person or not comes down to the mother’s dreams. Science and medical policy based on dreams. Wow. And you’re okay with that, oh, ye spawns of Sagan? Should we hand over all medical science questions to a Yaqui shaman dream interpreter?
I could devote another entire piece to the new big leftist legal fiction—that gender is nothing more than how one chooses to “identify.” No biology involved at all, just desire, just pure old-fashioned wishing-well magic. This is, of course, another 100 percent antiscience construct. And it’s another way in which smug atheist leftists are proving that they can take to faith-based antiscience twaddle as easily as any “young Earth” creationist.
Last week, on what might as well have been called “Caitlyn Jenner Day” (also known as “the day hipster millennials learned there’s a channel called ESPN”), I posted this sentence in threads on a couple of trans-positive Facebook pages:
The fact is that women are different from men. The science backs this up. It’s taboo in some circles to suggest that we’re genetically different from each other, and yet we are. Sex is a biological construct. There are sex differences between men and women, and how those differences manifest and what happens, from a genetic level to how the body operates, is different.
In each case, I was attacked for being an ignorant, trans-hating bully, and my comments were removed. But that quote I posted…where’s it from? The first two sentences are from Phyllis Greenberger, president and CEO of the Society for Women’s Health Research (science!), writing in the Huffington Post. The rest is from Tamarra James-Todd, an epidemiologist at Harvard Medical School (science!), from an interview in The Guardian. Both women were writing about the dangers to women’s health posed by not including female test subjects in medical research.
Science fact is now hate speech, thanks to an irrational leftist legal fiction that denies biological reality. Most smug atheist leftists will undoubtedly deal with the cognitive dissonance by ignoring it. It’s amazing the extent to which the human mind can compartmentalize. “We’re better than those ignorant right-wingers because we believe in science, man! Oh, and fetuses are either living beings or nonliving tumors based entirely on the dreams of the mother, gender has no basis in biology, and wishing real hard can turn a dude into a woman.”
Best of luck in dealing with those contradictions, my little Bill Mahers. Vaya con ciencia.
Quote of the Times;
If you are going through hell, keep going. – Chruchill
Link of the Times;
http://akinokure.blogspot.com/2015/09/will-desecration-by-syrian-immigrants.html
Each?
There was a lady sitting on a bench when an old man came over to sit down.
He moved over to her side and said "Do you believe in the hereafter?"
She said "Yes".
Then he replied, "Then you know what I’m hereafter."
*.*
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.
But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
*.*
Oneliners:
Sometimes I get stuck in the future. Just a few minutes ago I was thinking of how 120 years ago was 1905.
Reddit is like a dad at a kids birthday party, I’m watching everyone else have fun and not really understanding what's going on.
If deaf children fail to develop language after not being able to hear early in life, I wonder what abilities humans don't have because we haven't been exposed to them in infancy.
Someone, somewhere, is boycotting a product because it has they heard it has Dihydrogen Monoxide in it.
Men have sex with who they can and woman with who they want, but men marry who they want and woman marry who they can.
Asexual organisms can literally go fuck themselves.
Rich, young princes of Arab royal families are like thousands of Muslim Justin Biebers with diplomatic immunity.
Why the hell is there a sofa and a lamp in front of a fountain outdoors in the Friends theme song.
Every valuable and expensive new item that you own will eventually be some crap at a thrift store that nobody wants to buy.
I wonder how much interesting shit we've missed before the era of camera phones.
Spoons Are Small Bowls On A Stick.
Underwear are kind of like socks for your butt.
*.*
I've sure gotten old!
I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that
Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92.
Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my Florida driver's license.
*.*
Fort Hood Achieves Record-High 1½ Star Yelp Score
FORT HOOD, Texas — Leaders at the Fort Hood military base in Texas are hailing the 50 percent improvement to their Yelp page that has brought their rating up to 1½ stars, sources confirmed this morning.
“They’ve really turned this place around,” said Spc. Tara Stevens, admitting she recently amended her Yelp review of the base to 3-stars from an initial assessment of 1-star. “I work for the Base Services Group and we’re getting a lot fewer work orders to clean up fluid and bullet holes in ceilings.”
Single star ratings are typically reserved for restaurants from which every customer gets diarrhea, beauty salons that cater exclusively to street prostitutes, or martial arts studios that molest their younger clients, according to sources at Yelp. But ‘The Great Place,’ as it is referred to by general staff and a handful of billboards, is finally living up to its name.
“Yeah, I gave Fort Hood a pretty good review, I think. They said I could have my stapler back if I gave it a good review. But I didn’t get it back. And then they took away my computer so I can’t change it,” Sgt. Adam Norris, a soldier who’s been posted at Ft. Hood for the entirety of his 13-year career with the Army, told reporters.
“Cutting off the internet to North Ft. Hood [a deployment mobilization center] has really helped,” Command Sgt. Maj Patrick Williams explained. “We had an infantry battalion there for 63 days getting trained up for Afghanistan by truck drivers from First Army. That almost knocked us back down to 1 star. Fortunately, a lot of the reviews were removed due to Yelp’s rules on obscenity and hate speech.”
“I don’t know what isn’t to love,” Williams continued. “There have been a lot fewer murders in Killeen. And we have a Chile’s now.”
Sources confirmed a series of mandatory Change of Yelp Review Ceremonies have been scheduled by leadership across the post to commemorate the occasion.
Issue of the Times;
If Black Lives Matter, Blacks Need To Stop Killing Each Other
The biggest violent threat to African-American communities is
neither the “white” police (for example, the Baltimore officer
allegedly most responsible for Freddie Gray’s death was black)
nor white people in general. It is blacks themselves. Of all the
blacks killed in the United States over the last 35 years, only a
fraction have been killed by law enforcement and a small minority
by the broader white population.
The numbers may be “large” for these two categories of white-on-
black crime (America has 320 million inhabitants) but they are
spectacularly dwarfed by the rate at which blacks will shoot,
stab, and otherwise maim each other.
93% of murdered blacks between 1980 and 2008 were murdered by
fellow blacks. More recently, the proportion was 91%. Even
Politifact, which interprets “facts” according to a leftist
agenda, rated Rudy Giuliani’s referencing of the 1980-2008
statistics (when he criticized last year’s Ferguson riots) as
“Mostly True,” adding the very nitpicking technicality that
blacks mostly live amongst fellow blacks. This also suggests that
whites would be killed in greater numbers by blacks if
neighborhoods were more racially assimilated.
Or, in other words, people will kill each other in the context
they find themselves in, undermining, again, the mantra that a
purported white shooter and shot black (or the reverse) is always
a case of racist hate.
The tragic death of homeless man James Boyd over illegal camping
allegations received, surprisingly, some ample coverage by the
media. It still accounted for very little compared to Eric
Garner’s death. The reason? Race.
The white-on-black crime hysteria has much in common with the
vitriol surrounding feminism and alleged crimes against women.
Tears may flow from families but outrage is thoroughly muted,
especially from the likes of the NAACP, when a black child is
murdered in an area like South Central Chicago.
Why? Because the probable offender is almost guaranteed to be
black, like the victim. That hypothetical black child (actually
far from hypothetical if you watch the news) lying dead on the
streets of urban Illinois is afforded not even an iota of the
attention given to a Michael Brown, whose shooting death, albeit
heart-wrenching for his relatives, was reported by many black
witnesses as being a case of Officer Darren Wilson acting in
clear self-defense.
I personally regard the death of African-American Eric Garner in
New York as a police homicide. The facts are different in kind
from those surrounding Michael Brown. Garner may well have been
behaving illegally but the response from law enforcement was
excessive and, in the end, fatal. That said, it is very selective
to highlight Garner’s death at the expense of deaths like that of
James Boyd.
I chose Boyd, who was white and homeless, because his plight,
dying at the hands of Albuquerque police, did receive some wide
media attention. It simply paled in comparison, however, to that
provided to Garner, which cannot simply be explained by the video
recording of Garner’s gruesome suffocation or the fact that
police involved with Boyd’s shooting have been put on trial.
Both were accused of “minor” crimes at the times of their deaths,
with Boyd allegedly camping illegally due to his homelessness and
Garner supposedly selling untaxed cigarettes.
Based on the media and popular airing of the story we can safely
say Boyd is a victim, but only at the bottom of a victim’s
monument, whereas Garner is at the apex. Why? And God help your
regular black-on-white, white-on-white or black-on-black homicide
victim, who might be extremely fortunate to make the six o’clock
news.
When will the “Black Lives Matter” movement go after black
shooters and not Bernie Sanders?
It is conceivable that within the next ten years or so, SJWs will
start to continually and explicitly blame whites for every
trigger pulled by an African-American on another African-
American. Right now, this allocation of direct responsibility to
Caucasians is more implicit, brought up in conversations about
slavery, Jim Crow and a twisting of the original civil rights
movement (the actual civil rights of the 1960s, not the
opportunism of a Sharpton or Jackson today).
Other mechanisms for apportioning blame includes “white
privilege,” which tendentiously groups together the likes of
affluent Mitt Romney and Donald Trump with greatly impoverished
Scots-Irish white Americans in two of America’s poorest states,
Mississippi and Alabama.
Meanwhile, aside from the occasional (excellent) Samuel L.
Jackson video, which doesn’t even mention African-Americans
specifically, few are interested in perceiving black people, most
notably young black men, as free agents, whatever influences may
be around them.
The convenient segue is to focus on the less than 1% of black
deaths caused by police, which includes a great many instances of
self-defense and needing to protect the public. When the “hate
the police” narrative temporarily runs out of steam, one can
always confront Bernie Sanders, the “Black Lives Matter”
movement’s lackey, and accuse him of some sort of thoughtcrime
for “not doing things right.”
Will those really interested in black lives please stand up?
“Gangsta” rap’s glorification of violence has probably killed
many times more people than all police shootings, justified and
unjustified, combined.
You do not cure cancer that has metastasized throughout most of
the body by treating, say, only one’s left hand. So if the rate
of black deaths is an issue without any equivalent, which is
already doubtful when other racial deaths are being calculatedly
quarantined from the underlying discussion, a holistic approach
to combating violence is what will matter and pay dividends. A
politicized method designed to please a Rachel Dolezal or Louis
Farrakhan only serves to divide, antagonize, and hide the facts.
Beleaguered liberals like Bernie Sanders and ex-Maryland Governor
and Presidential candidate Martin O’Malley, who was booed for
saying “All Lives Matter”, suddenly sense that the putrid corn
syrup they and their leftwing colleagues have been feeding to the
African-American community and SJWs for years is now being
vomited up on them. For sanity’s sake, the only choice is to
confront the festering wound of black-on-black crime.
No parent, boyfriend or girlfriend, spouse, child or friend
deserves to have their loved ones taking from them in a homicide.
Yet what a homicide is seems to change daily, according to the
wishes of those pursuing their own agendas. Worse still is how a
black death is only really considered a death by SJWs if a white
or the “system” is behind it.
The majority of black deaths are thus deemed irrelevant by the
same folks claiming black lives matter. How typical.
Quote of the Times;
“I know all about the despair of overcoming chronic temptation. It is not serious, provided self-offended petulance, annoyance at breaking records, impatience, etc., don’t get the upper hand. No amount of falls will really undo us if we keep picking ourselves up each time... The only fatal thing is to lose one’s temper and give up.” - C.S. Lewis
Link of the Times;
http://www.cheaperthandirt.com/
He moved over to her side and said "Do you believe in the hereafter?"
She said "Yes".
Then he replied, "Then you know what I’m hereafter."
*.*
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.
But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
*.*
Oneliners:
Sometimes I get stuck in the future. Just a few minutes ago I was thinking of how 120 years ago was 1905.
Reddit is like a dad at a kids birthday party, I’m watching everyone else have fun and not really understanding what's going on.
If deaf children fail to develop language after not being able to hear early in life, I wonder what abilities humans don't have because we haven't been exposed to them in infancy.
Someone, somewhere, is boycotting a product because it has they heard it has Dihydrogen Monoxide in it.
Men have sex with who they can and woman with who they want, but men marry who they want and woman marry who they can.
Asexual organisms can literally go fuck themselves.
Rich, young princes of Arab royal families are like thousands of Muslim Justin Biebers with diplomatic immunity.
Why the hell is there a sofa and a lamp in front of a fountain outdoors in the Friends theme song.
Every valuable and expensive new item that you own will eventually be some crap at a thrift store that nobody wants to buy.
I wonder how much interesting shit we've missed before the era of camera phones.
Spoons Are Small Bowls On A Stick.
Underwear are kind of like socks for your butt.
*.*
I've sure gotten old!
I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that
Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92.
Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my Florida driver's license.
*.*
Fort Hood Achieves Record-High 1½ Star Yelp Score
FORT HOOD, Texas — Leaders at the Fort Hood military base in Texas are hailing the 50 percent improvement to their Yelp page that has brought their rating up to 1½ stars, sources confirmed this morning.
“They’ve really turned this place around,” said Spc. Tara Stevens, admitting she recently amended her Yelp review of the base to 3-stars from an initial assessment of 1-star. “I work for the Base Services Group and we’re getting a lot fewer work orders to clean up fluid and bullet holes in ceilings.”
Single star ratings are typically reserved for restaurants from which every customer gets diarrhea, beauty salons that cater exclusively to street prostitutes, or martial arts studios that molest their younger clients, according to sources at Yelp. But ‘The Great Place,’ as it is referred to by general staff and a handful of billboards, is finally living up to its name.
“Yeah, I gave Fort Hood a pretty good review, I think. They said I could have my stapler back if I gave it a good review. But I didn’t get it back. And then they took away my computer so I can’t change it,” Sgt. Adam Norris, a soldier who’s been posted at Ft. Hood for the entirety of his 13-year career with the Army, told reporters.
“Cutting off the internet to North Ft. Hood [a deployment mobilization center] has really helped,” Command Sgt. Maj Patrick Williams explained. “We had an infantry battalion there for 63 days getting trained up for Afghanistan by truck drivers from First Army. That almost knocked us back down to 1 star. Fortunately, a lot of the reviews were removed due to Yelp’s rules on obscenity and hate speech.”
“I don’t know what isn’t to love,” Williams continued. “There have been a lot fewer murders in Killeen. And we have a Chile’s now.”
Sources confirmed a series of mandatory Change of Yelp Review Ceremonies have been scheduled by leadership across the post to commemorate the occasion.
Issue of the Times;
If Black Lives Matter, Blacks Need To Stop Killing Each Other
The biggest violent threat to African-American communities is
neither the “white” police (for example, the Baltimore officer
allegedly most responsible for Freddie Gray’s death was black)
nor white people in general. It is blacks themselves. Of all the
blacks killed in the United States over the last 35 years, only a
fraction have been killed by law enforcement and a small minority
by the broader white population.
The numbers may be “large” for these two categories of white-on-
black crime (America has 320 million inhabitants) but they are
spectacularly dwarfed by the rate at which blacks will shoot,
stab, and otherwise maim each other.
93% of murdered blacks between 1980 and 2008 were murdered by
fellow blacks. More recently, the proportion was 91%. Even
Politifact, which interprets “facts” according to a leftist
agenda, rated Rudy Giuliani’s referencing of the 1980-2008
statistics (when he criticized last year’s Ferguson riots) as
“Mostly True,” adding the very nitpicking technicality that
blacks mostly live amongst fellow blacks. This also suggests that
whites would be killed in greater numbers by blacks if
neighborhoods were more racially assimilated.
Or, in other words, people will kill each other in the context
they find themselves in, undermining, again, the mantra that a
purported white shooter and shot black (or the reverse) is always
a case of racist hate.
The tragic death of homeless man James Boyd over illegal camping
allegations received, surprisingly, some ample coverage by the
media. It still accounted for very little compared to Eric
Garner’s death. The reason? Race.
The white-on-black crime hysteria has much in common with the
vitriol surrounding feminism and alleged crimes against women.
Tears may flow from families but outrage is thoroughly muted,
especially from the likes of the NAACP, when a black child is
murdered in an area like South Central Chicago.
Why? Because the probable offender is almost guaranteed to be
black, like the victim. That hypothetical black child (actually
far from hypothetical if you watch the news) lying dead on the
streets of urban Illinois is afforded not even an iota of the
attention given to a Michael Brown, whose shooting death, albeit
heart-wrenching for his relatives, was reported by many black
witnesses as being a case of Officer Darren Wilson acting in
clear self-defense.
I personally regard the death of African-American Eric Garner in
New York as a police homicide. The facts are different in kind
from those surrounding Michael Brown. Garner may well have been
behaving illegally but the response from law enforcement was
excessive and, in the end, fatal. That said, it is very selective
to highlight Garner’s death at the expense of deaths like that of
James Boyd.
I chose Boyd, who was white and homeless, because his plight,
dying at the hands of Albuquerque police, did receive some wide
media attention. It simply paled in comparison, however, to that
provided to Garner, which cannot simply be explained by the video
recording of Garner’s gruesome suffocation or the fact that
police involved with Boyd’s shooting have been put on trial.
Both were accused of “minor” crimes at the times of their deaths,
with Boyd allegedly camping illegally due to his homelessness and
Garner supposedly selling untaxed cigarettes.
Based on the media and popular airing of the story we can safely
say Boyd is a victim, but only at the bottom of a victim’s
monument, whereas Garner is at the apex. Why? And God help your
regular black-on-white, white-on-white or black-on-black homicide
victim, who might be extremely fortunate to make the six o’clock
news.
When will the “Black Lives Matter” movement go after black
shooters and not Bernie Sanders?
It is conceivable that within the next ten years or so, SJWs will
start to continually and explicitly blame whites for every
trigger pulled by an African-American on another African-
American. Right now, this allocation of direct responsibility to
Caucasians is more implicit, brought up in conversations about
slavery, Jim Crow and a twisting of the original civil rights
movement (the actual civil rights of the 1960s, not the
opportunism of a Sharpton or Jackson today).
Other mechanisms for apportioning blame includes “white
privilege,” which tendentiously groups together the likes of
affluent Mitt Romney and Donald Trump with greatly impoverished
Scots-Irish white Americans in two of America’s poorest states,
Mississippi and Alabama.
Meanwhile, aside from the occasional (excellent) Samuel L.
Jackson video, which doesn’t even mention African-Americans
specifically, few are interested in perceiving black people, most
notably young black men, as free agents, whatever influences may
be around them.
The convenient segue is to focus on the less than 1% of black
deaths caused by police, which includes a great many instances of
self-defense and needing to protect the public. When the “hate
the police” narrative temporarily runs out of steam, one can
always confront Bernie Sanders, the “Black Lives Matter”
movement’s lackey, and accuse him of some sort of thoughtcrime
for “not doing things right.”
Will those really interested in black lives please stand up?
“Gangsta” rap’s glorification of violence has probably killed
many times more people than all police shootings, justified and
unjustified, combined.
You do not cure cancer that has metastasized throughout most of
the body by treating, say, only one’s left hand. So if the rate
of black deaths is an issue without any equivalent, which is
already doubtful when other racial deaths are being calculatedly
quarantined from the underlying discussion, a holistic approach
to combating violence is what will matter and pay dividends. A
politicized method designed to please a Rachel Dolezal or Louis
Farrakhan only serves to divide, antagonize, and hide the facts.
Beleaguered liberals like Bernie Sanders and ex-Maryland Governor
and Presidential candidate Martin O’Malley, who was booed for
saying “All Lives Matter”, suddenly sense that the putrid corn
syrup they and their leftwing colleagues have been feeding to the
African-American community and SJWs for years is now being
vomited up on them. For sanity’s sake, the only choice is to
confront the festering wound of black-on-black crime.
No parent, boyfriend or girlfriend, spouse, child or friend
deserves to have their loved ones taking from them in a homicide.
Yet what a homicide is seems to change daily, according to the
wishes of those pursuing their own agendas. Worse still is how a
black death is only really considered a death by SJWs if a white
or the “system” is behind it.
The majority of black deaths are thus deemed irrelevant by the
same folks claiming black lives matter. How typical.
Quote of the Times;
“I know all about the despair of overcoming chronic temptation. It is not serious, provided self-offended petulance, annoyance at breaking records, impatience, etc., don’t get the upper hand. No amount of falls will really undo us if we keep picking ourselves up each time... The only fatal thing is to lose one’s temper and give up.” - C.S. Lewis
Link of the Times;
http://www.cheaperthandirt.com/
Patton?
The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. "Johnny," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?
"Thirty-four," Johnny answered unhesitatingly.
The teacher replied "Well, that's not far from my actual age. Tell me...how did you guess?"
Oh, there's nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy."
*.*
Larry's barn burned down, and, Susan, his wife, called the insurance company ...
Susan: We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and I want my money.
Agent: Whoa there just a minute, Susan. It doesn't work quite like that. We will ascertain the value of the old barn and provide you with a new one of comparable worth.
Susan, after a pause: I'd like to cancel the policy on my husband.
*.*
Saw this on an employee's shirt at a Halloween store: "We put the tomb in costume!"
Kylie Jenner has introduced her own line of hair extensions. Absolutely nothing real about that family.
Artificial Intelligence experts say that over the next few years, robots will be taking most people's jobs. Can I request we start with the Raking Leaves robots?
Life expectancy in the U.S. has reached an all-time high. A spokesman for Craftsmen tools, the ones with the lifetime guarantee, responded with, "Damn!"
It's hard to take the Nobel Chemistry prize seriously when it wasn't awarded to the people who discovered Pumpkin Spice Latte.
*.*
A young man visiting a dude ranch wanted to be "macho," so he went out walking with one of the hired hands. As they were walking through the barnyard, the visitor tried starting a conversation: "Say, look at that big bunch of cows."
The hired hand replied, "Not 'bunch,' but 'herd.' "
"Heard what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Sure, I've heard of cows. There's a big bunch of 'em right over there."
*.*
A hillbilly was making his first visit to a hospital where his teenage son was about to have an operation. Watching the doctor's every move, he asked, "what's that?"
The doctor explained, "this is an anesthetic. After he gets this he won't know a thing."
"Save your time, Doc," exclaimed the man. "He don't know nothing now."
Issue of the Times;
A Letter from General George S. Patton to His Son
On June 6, 1944, General George S. Patton wrote this letter to his twenty-year-old son, George Jr., who was enrolled at West Point. Patton Sr. was in England training the Third Army in preparation for the battles that would follow the invasion at Normandy.
Dear George:
At 0700 this morning the BBC announced that the German Radio had just come out with an announcement of the landing of Allied Paratroops and of large numbers of assault craft near shore. So that is it.
This group of unconquerable heroes whom I command are not in yet but we will be soon—I wish I was there now as it is a lovely sunny day for a battle and I am fed up with just sitting.
I have no immediate idea of being killed but one can never tell and none of us can live forever, so if I should go don’t worry but set yourself to do better than I have.
All men are timid on entering any fight; whether it is the first fight or the last fight all of us are timid. Cowards are those who let their timidity get the better of their manhood. You will never do that because of your blood lines on both sides. I think I have told you the story of Marshall Touraine who fought under Louis XIV. On the morning of one of his last battles—he had been fighting for forty years—he was mounting his horse when a young ADC [aide-de-camp] who had just come from the court and had never missed a meal or heard a hostile shot said: “M. de Touraine it amazes me that a man of your supposed courage should permit his knees to tremble as he walks out to mount.” Touraine replied “My lord duke I admit that my knees do tremble but should they know where I shall this day take them they would shake even more.” That is it. Your knees may shake but they will always take you towards the enemy. Well so much for that.
There are apparently two types of successful soldiers. Those who get on by being unobtrusive and those who get on by being obtrusive. I am of the latter type and seem to be rare and unpopular: but it is my method. One has to choose a system and stick to it; people who are not themselves are nobody.
To be a successful soldier you must know history. Read it objectively–dates and even the minute details of tactics are useless. What you must know is how man reacts. Weapons change but man who uses them changes not at all. To win battles you do not beat weapons–you beat the soul of man of the enemy man. To do that you have to destroy his weapons, but that is only incidental. You must read biography and especially autobiography. If you will do it you will find that war is simple. Decide what will hurt the enemy most within the limits of your capabilities to harm him and then do it. TAKE CALCULATED RISKS. That is quite different from being rash. My personal belief is that if you have a 50% chance take it because the superior fighting qualities of American soldiers lead by me will surely give you the extra 1% necessary.
In Sicily I decided as a result of my information, observations and a sixth sense that I have that the enemy did not have another large scale attack in his system. I bet my shirt on that and I was right. You cannot make war safely but no dead general has ever been criticized so you have that way out always.
I am sure that if every leader who goes into battle will promise himself that he will come out either a conqueror or a corpse he is sure to win. There is no doubt of that. Defeat is not due to losses but to the destruction of the soul of the leaders. The “Live to fight another day” doctrine.
The most vital quality a soldier can possess is SELF CONFIDENCE–utter, complete and bumptious. You can have doubts about your good looks, about your intelligence, about your self control but to win in war you must have NO doubts about your ability as a soldier.
What success I have had results from the fact that I have always been certain that my military reactions were correct. Many people do not agree with me; they are wrong. The unerring jury of history written long after both of us are dead will prove me correct.
Note that I speak of “Military reactions”–no one is borne with them any more than anyone is borne with muscles. You can be born with the soul capable of correct military reactions or the body capable of having big muscles, but both qualities must be developed by hard work.
The intensity of your desire to acquire any special ability depends on character, on ambition. I think that your decision to study this summer instead of enjoying yourself shows that you have character and ambition—they are wonderful possessions.
Soldiers, all men in fact, are natural hero worshipers. Officers with a flare for command realize this and emphasize in their conduct, dress and deportment the qualities they seek to produce in their men. When I was a second lieutenant I had a captain who was very sloppy and usually late yet he got after the men for just those faults; he was a failure.
The troops I have commanded have always been well dressed, been smart saluters, been prompt and bold in action because I have personally set the example in these qualities. The influence one man can have on thousands is a never-ending source of wonder to me. You are always on parade. Officers who through laziness or a foolish desire to be popular fail to enforce discipline and the proper wearing of uniforms and equipment not in the presence of the enemy will also fail in battle, and if they fail in battle they are potential murderers. There is no such thing as: “A good field soldier:” you are either a good soldier or a bad soldier.
Well this has been quite a sermon but don’t get the idea that it is my swan song because it is not–I have not finished my job yet.
Your affectionate father.
Quote of the Times;
“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular opinion.” – Kerouac
Link of the Times;
https://www.youtube.com/embed/wq_lhlIn1e0
"Thirty-four," Johnny answered unhesitatingly.
The teacher replied "Well, that's not far from my actual age. Tell me...how did you guess?"
Oh, there's nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy."
*.*
Larry's barn burned down, and, Susan, his wife, called the insurance company ...
Susan: We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and I want my money.
Agent: Whoa there just a minute, Susan. It doesn't work quite like that. We will ascertain the value of the old barn and provide you with a new one of comparable worth.
Susan, after a pause: I'd like to cancel the policy on my husband.
*.*
Saw this on an employee's shirt at a Halloween store: "We put the tomb in costume!"
Kylie Jenner has introduced her own line of hair extensions. Absolutely nothing real about that family.
Artificial Intelligence experts say that over the next few years, robots will be taking most people's jobs. Can I request we start with the Raking Leaves robots?
Life expectancy in the U.S. has reached an all-time high. A spokesman for Craftsmen tools, the ones with the lifetime guarantee, responded with, "Damn!"
It's hard to take the Nobel Chemistry prize seriously when it wasn't awarded to the people who discovered Pumpkin Spice Latte.
*.*
A young man visiting a dude ranch wanted to be "macho," so he went out walking with one of the hired hands. As they were walking through the barnyard, the visitor tried starting a conversation: "Say, look at that big bunch of cows."
The hired hand replied, "Not 'bunch,' but 'herd.' "
"Heard what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Sure, I've heard of cows. There's a big bunch of 'em right over there."
*.*
A hillbilly was making his first visit to a hospital where his teenage son was about to have an operation. Watching the doctor's every move, he asked, "what's that?"
The doctor explained, "this is an anesthetic. After he gets this he won't know a thing."
"Save your time, Doc," exclaimed the man. "He don't know nothing now."
Issue of the Times;
A Letter from General George S. Patton to His Son
On June 6, 1944, General George S. Patton wrote this letter to his twenty-year-old son, George Jr., who was enrolled at West Point. Patton Sr. was in England training the Third Army in preparation for the battles that would follow the invasion at Normandy.
Dear George:
At 0700 this morning the BBC announced that the German Radio had just come out with an announcement of the landing of Allied Paratroops and of large numbers of assault craft near shore. So that is it.
This group of unconquerable heroes whom I command are not in yet but we will be soon—I wish I was there now as it is a lovely sunny day for a battle and I am fed up with just sitting.
I have no immediate idea of being killed but one can never tell and none of us can live forever, so if I should go don’t worry but set yourself to do better than I have.
All men are timid on entering any fight; whether it is the first fight or the last fight all of us are timid. Cowards are those who let their timidity get the better of their manhood. You will never do that because of your blood lines on both sides. I think I have told you the story of Marshall Touraine who fought under Louis XIV. On the morning of one of his last battles—he had been fighting for forty years—he was mounting his horse when a young ADC [aide-de-camp] who had just come from the court and had never missed a meal or heard a hostile shot said: “M. de Touraine it amazes me that a man of your supposed courage should permit his knees to tremble as he walks out to mount.” Touraine replied “My lord duke I admit that my knees do tremble but should they know where I shall this day take them they would shake even more.” That is it. Your knees may shake but they will always take you towards the enemy. Well so much for that.
There are apparently two types of successful soldiers. Those who get on by being unobtrusive and those who get on by being obtrusive. I am of the latter type and seem to be rare and unpopular: but it is my method. One has to choose a system and stick to it; people who are not themselves are nobody.
To be a successful soldier you must know history. Read it objectively–dates and even the minute details of tactics are useless. What you must know is how man reacts. Weapons change but man who uses them changes not at all. To win battles you do not beat weapons–you beat the soul of man of the enemy man. To do that you have to destroy his weapons, but that is only incidental. You must read biography and especially autobiography. If you will do it you will find that war is simple. Decide what will hurt the enemy most within the limits of your capabilities to harm him and then do it. TAKE CALCULATED RISKS. That is quite different from being rash. My personal belief is that if you have a 50% chance take it because the superior fighting qualities of American soldiers lead by me will surely give you the extra 1% necessary.
In Sicily I decided as a result of my information, observations and a sixth sense that I have that the enemy did not have another large scale attack in his system. I bet my shirt on that and I was right. You cannot make war safely but no dead general has ever been criticized so you have that way out always.
I am sure that if every leader who goes into battle will promise himself that he will come out either a conqueror or a corpse he is sure to win. There is no doubt of that. Defeat is not due to losses but to the destruction of the soul of the leaders. The “Live to fight another day” doctrine.
The most vital quality a soldier can possess is SELF CONFIDENCE–utter, complete and bumptious. You can have doubts about your good looks, about your intelligence, about your self control but to win in war you must have NO doubts about your ability as a soldier.
What success I have had results from the fact that I have always been certain that my military reactions were correct. Many people do not agree with me; they are wrong. The unerring jury of history written long after both of us are dead will prove me correct.
Note that I speak of “Military reactions”–no one is borne with them any more than anyone is borne with muscles. You can be born with the soul capable of correct military reactions or the body capable of having big muscles, but both qualities must be developed by hard work.
The intensity of your desire to acquire any special ability depends on character, on ambition. I think that your decision to study this summer instead of enjoying yourself shows that you have character and ambition—they are wonderful possessions.
Soldiers, all men in fact, are natural hero worshipers. Officers with a flare for command realize this and emphasize in their conduct, dress and deportment the qualities they seek to produce in their men. When I was a second lieutenant I had a captain who was very sloppy and usually late yet he got after the men for just those faults; he was a failure.
The troops I have commanded have always been well dressed, been smart saluters, been prompt and bold in action because I have personally set the example in these qualities. The influence one man can have on thousands is a never-ending source of wonder to me. You are always on parade. Officers who through laziness or a foolish desire to be popular fail to enforce discipline and the proper wearing of uniforms and equipment not in the presence of the enemy will also fail in battle, and if they fail in battle they are potential murderers. There is no such thing as: “A good field soldier:” you are either a good soldier or a bad soldier.
Well this has been quite a sermon but don’t get the idea that it is my swan song because it is not–I have not finished my job yet.
Your affectionate father.
Quote of the Times;
“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular opinion.” – Kerouac
Link of the Times;
https://www.youtube.com/embed/wq_lhlIn1e0
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And someone shot a duck.
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And someone shot a duck.
An Images & Ideas, Inc. Service.
No Vegans were harmed in the making of this site. We're looking for a new provider.