Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes.
Large, small, circle, square, thin crust, deep dish, extra toppings…
What is the similarity between a communist and an IT technician?
They both believe restarting it might work.
A woman joins a country club and when she hears the guys talking about their golf round, she says, "I played on my college's golf team. I was pretty good. Mind if I join you next week?" No one wants to say 'yes', but they're on the spot…
Finally, one man says, "Okay, but we start at 6:30 a.m."
He figures the early tee-time will discourage her.
The woman says this may be a problem and asks if she can be up to 15 minutes late.
They roll their eyes, but say, "Okay."
She's there at 6:30 am. sharp and beats all of them with an eye-opening 2-under par round.
She's fun and pleasant and the guys are impressed.
They congratulate her and invite her back the next week.
She smiles, and says, "I'll be there at 6:30, or 6:45."
The next week she again shows up at 6:30 sharp.
Only this time, she plays left-handed.
The three guys are incredulous as she still beats them with an even par round, despite playing with her off-hand.
They're totally amazed.
They can't figure her out.
She's very pleasant and a gracious winner.
They invite her back again, but each man harbors a burning desire to beat her.
The third week, she's 15 minutes late, which irritates the guys.
This week she plays right-handed and narrowly beats all three of them.
The men grumble that her late arrival is petty gamesmanship on her part.
However, she's so charming and complimentary of their strong play, they can't hold a grudge.
This woman is a riddle no one can figure out.
They have a couple of beers in the Clubhouse and finally, one of the men asks her, "How do you decide if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"
The lady blushes, and grins. "When my dad taught me to play golf, I learned that I was ambidextrous." she replies. "I like to switch back and forth."
"When I got married after college, I discovered my husband always sleeps in the nude. From then on, I developed a silly habit. Right before I leave in the morning for golf practice, I pull the covers off him. If his willie points to the right, I golf right-handed; if it points to the left, I golf left-handed."
The guys think this is hysterical.
Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys says, "What if it's pointing straight up?"
She says, "Then, I'm fifteen minutes late.
The judge says: “you must pay the court $12,000.”
Mario, surprised, asks: “Why?”
The judge replies: “It’s a fine.”
Mario, heartbroken, sadly says: “No itsa not.”
Microsoft have released a festive advent calendar this Christmas.
No chocolates, just a load of f#@k!ng updates every time you open your windows.
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Don’t whine about footballers taking the knee and then give them your money for tickets and gear. The Marxist virtue signalling will only stop when the money does. - @TheAliceSmith
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Governments have confiscated nearly $70 billion from Americans By Bob Unruh
'Civil forfeiture' gives law enforcement 'perverse' financial incentives
A new study by the Institute for Justice finds local and federal governments have confiscated nearly $70 billion from Americans over the last 20 years.
That's without any of the individuals being convicted of any crime, according to "Policing for Profit: The Abuse of Civil Asset Forfeiture.".
It's the third edition of the report, which includes 17 million data points from 45 states, the District of Columbia and the federal government.
It reveals a "massive nationwide problem," with governments taking "at least $68.8 billion – that we know of."
Not all states provided information.
"The heart of the problem remains poor state and federal civil forfeiture laws, which are little improved since the previous edition of 'Policing for Profit' was published in 2015,' said IJ senior director of strategic research and report co-author Lisa Knepper. "Most laws still stack the deck against property owners and give law enforcement perverse financial incentives to pursue property over justice."
The report gives a grade of D+ or worse to 35 states and the federal government. New Mexico earned the report's only A, largely based on a reform that removed many options for civil forfeiture and directed all proceeds to the state's general fund.
"Importantly, New Mexico’s reform has not compromised public safety, according to a new analysis published in the report. Compared to neighboring Texas and Colorado, New Mexico’s crime rates remained steady in the months and years following the reform, suggesting forfeiture does not deter crime and law enforcement are able to do their jobs without forfeiture proceeds," IJ said.
The report also shows forfeiture procedures seldom target big-time criminals.
"Data from 21 states show half of all currency forfeitures are worth less than $1,300, hardly the stuff of vast criminal enterprises and far less than it would cost to hire an attorney to fight back," said IJ.
"Despite its national prevalence and popularity with police and prosecutors, civil forfeiture simply doesn’t work," said IJ senior research analyst and report co-author Jennifer McDonald. "It doesn’t fight crime, it doesn’t target criminal kingpins, and it doesn’t support crime victims or community programs."
Civil forfeiture happens when police, or some other law enforcement officer, come across cash or a valuable asset then claim it might have been used in or the result of a crime. Often the owners never are charged, but they then must go to court to obtain the return of their private property.
Part of the problem is that frequently law enforcement agencies that confiscate cash or assets benefit from them if the owner is unable to fund a court fight to get it back.
"No one should ever lose their property without first being convicted of a crime, but lawmakers should be especially concerned about forfeiture abuse now, as local governments face increased fiscal pressure amid the COVID-19 pandemic," said Knepper.
The report recommends that all civil forfeiture procedures be eliminated.
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