The average woman spends 11 minutes a day blow drying her hair in the bathroom.
Well, the hair that's left and not clogging up the shower drain.
The best part about living in Washington State?
You don't need a summer body if you don't have a summer.
Going To College?
Here is a definitive list of items you must take to college with you this Fall:
Extra internal organs to trade for tuition: One kidney alone will cover 3 credit hours!
$8,000 cash: For books! Oh, you thought your tuition covered books? AHAHAHAHA!
Several changes of extremely ugly, unattractive clothing: So you'll fit in with all the other GenZ kids.
Extra change of pronouns: You racist bigot.
Cat ears for some reason: Everyone's doing it.
Acoustic guitar and ability to play one song: Everyone will love you!
Small fan, reusable water bottle, pencil case, and durable book bag: To sell for beer money.
Magneto helmet to keep professors out of your head: Helmet hair isn't a problem because you'll never want to take it off. Ever.
#2 pencil: To poke your eyes out during the cafeteria's drag show.
A completely new identity for when you first get canceled for telling a politically incorrect joke on social media.
I'm sleeping with the minister's wife. Can you keep him busy in church for an hour after service for me?
Mike doesn't like it, but being a friend, he agrees. After the service, Mike asks the minister all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied.
Finally the minister gets annoyed and asks Mike what he's really up to. Mike, feeling guilty, finally confesses, "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, and he asked me to keep you occupied."
The minister thinks for a minute, smiles, puts a fatherly hand on Mike's shoulder and says, "You should hurry home now. My wife died a year ago."
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Quote of the Times;
“You know, farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil, and you’re a thousand miles from the corn field.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
Link of the Times;
Issue of the Times;
There’s No Despot So Tyrannical As A Green Politician by I & I Editorial Board
Reports of unrest over environmental policies from the Netherlands and Sri Lanka are much more than novelty news. What is happening in both spots is a lesson that has to be learned quickly. If not, there’s deep trouble ahead.
Dutch farmers, whose history of crop yields puts them among the most productive in the world, continue to protest rules that limit their use of nitrogen, a nutrient in commercial fertilizers that converts to nitrous oxide, which is feared as a greenhouse gas. Officials expected them to cut use 50% nationally, which means in some regions, the reductions will be as high as 95%.
The crippled farmers, their survival under attack, are, as they should be, revolting.
“Imagine if you’re a fifth-generation farmer, living on your land, making a living, being part of the local community” and suddenly there is “basically no future, no future for farming, but also no future for the economic, social, cultural fabric of the countryside,” Wytse Sonnema of the Netherlands Agriculture and Horticulture Organization told the Australian media.
“There’s a broad sense of frustration, of anger, even despair amongst farmers at the moment.”
But political officials don’t care about the effects of their tyranny. They’re too dedicated to demonstrating before the world their great green cred.
Don’t think that it can’t happen here. Canada, which exports tens of billions of dollars of agricultural products to the U.S. every year and is, unfortunately, “led” by boy Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, plans to force nitrogen cuts that will “decimate Canadian farming.” And also don’t think such a truly rancid idea won’t easily make it across the border to Washington and blue state capitals itching to put more restrictions on an ostensibly free people to carry out their eco-madness.
Meanwhile, a year after announcing the country would become the world’s first 100% organic nation, Sri Lanka is a “nation wrecked by green agricultural policies.” Its agriculture sector is in such ruins that the country is begging Russia and India for fuel, the economy has collapsed, and there’s not enough money to buy food. The Sri Lankan president, whose palace was stormed, will leave office Wednesday, and the outgoing prime minister as well as dozens of other politicians have nowhere to live because hungry and desperate protesters have burned down their houses.
Imagine this country had Democratic Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Green New Deal become law. Its fanatical emissions cuts would have caused energy costs to soar, choked economic growth (it would be worse than it is now), and cost from $51 trillion to $93 trillion over its first decade. The Green New Deal was in fact initially conceived not as an environmental protection policy but rather as a “how-do-you-change-the-entire economy thing,” according to the New York congresswoman’s former chief of staff.
So far, we’ve avoided Ocasio-Cortez’s reign of terror. But in California, the petty environmental tyrannies, centered on the wars on greenhouse gas emissions and plastics, continue to accumulate – and spread. California residents don’t even have the freedom to throw away their food scraps as they see fit. They now must conform to the way government says it has to be done.
Of course, petty tyrannies can quickly and easily grow into totalitarianism. The step from “public servant” to green tyrant is shorter than most of us would think.
News of the Times;